Coping strategies

There are different approaches to coping with postnatal illness.

Diet
You may want to pay attention to eating a balanced diet. Your body has just undergone a significant change and you need to provide it with all of the necessary nutrients and vitamins. It can take a long time for your body to become stabilised again after pregnancy and childbirth. Also if you are breast-feeding it is necessary to consume more calories.

Keep your blood sugars up and eat! You may be so busy caring for your baby and family that you are putting your needs last. It will not be good for anyone (especially you) if you get sick and run down. Try and keep some foods handy that are easy to snack on such as fruit, cheese, bread, and vegetables.

Support groups
Support groups for new mothers, such as run by local health visitors, NCT or community centres can be lifelines. Groups can become good sources of contact, help and encouragement and you can make new friends, since other mothers often feel quite similar to you. The problem is that when you feel bad inside yourself it is hard to make the effort.

Going for a walk
Going out of the house once a day with your baby can be part of your strategy of making yourself and your baby feel better! You may like to walk with someone else.

Baby massage
You could attend a baby massage group where you can experiment with ways of holding and touching your baby, to become more comfortable and in tune with each other. Research shows that massaged babies put on more weight and are easier to comfort. Baby massage can help you to bond with your baby and feel better about yourself as a mother.

Quality time with yourself
If it is possible spend an hour on your own, maybe to go swimming, do exercise or to have your hair done, to get a massage or just to have a bath, or a sleep. For this you need a trusted other with whom to leave your baby. This is a luxury not everyone has. It is important however to find some moments for yourself.

Small steps
Give yourself permission to take one step at a time and set small goals. Try not to expect too much. Looking after a baby is demanding. You cannot predict what shape each day will take.

Talk to someone
If you think you are depressed or unwell talk to someone as soon as possible about your feelings. Try not to delay it, since the longer you wait, the harder it can be. Maybe you could talk to your partner, mother, sister, friend, and if that does not work find a counsellor.

Parent – Infant Counselling
Parent – infant counselling is based on the knowledge that the first few months and years in a mother and baby relationship are very important for the wellbeing of both mother and baby later on in life. That is why women should be enabled to seek support from a counsellor without it attaching stigma. Research confirms that women and babies benefited from meeting with older women, who are friendly, accepting and trained to listen to parents and babies. Your counsellor will together with you try to understand the roots of your problems and help you reflect on how you and your baby interact. The purpose of parent – infant counselling is that you are supported in changing unhelpful ways of being together. This approach does take time. However by talking about what bothers you with someone, you may be able to think about yourself and your baby in a new light.

Medication
You can go to your GP and get medication, which may help you sleep, or reduce the anxiety. It is important however to remember that it will take some time to become effective. There may also be side effects on your body and if you are breast feeding this will influence your decision.

Whatever works for you
One approach is not better or exclusive of the other. They could all work well together. However different ways of coping suit different people. There is no one right way. Like with pregnancy and labour, what matters is what works for you.

What is postnatal depression?
Do I have postnatal depression?
Reasons for postnatal depression
Parent-Infant Counselling
Useful contacts

Consultations with Monika